Those light brown eyes that were staring back with the yearning for love and 10 months later closed permanently having found it. 5 months before she turned 3 my little girl left the world today diagnosed with tongue cancer.
Being abandoned by her parents as they could not take care of her, Cindie never really mixed with the other children at the home or spoke to the caretakers unless she needed something. Actually she could not speak much at all come to think of it, messaged were mostly conveyed through action based. Maybe her fear to interact with us had me magnetically attracted to her.
Cindie was a picture of beauty; she had soft brown eyes, a even softer skin which complemented the clear peachy complexion which would turn red every time she went under the sun, along with the jet black hair which would sway by the tiniest movement of wind. Her smile could melt anyone’s heart
Over the first few weeks, getting to know her was really a task. She brought a new meaning of stubborn into my life. Never once for the first 2 and half weeks did she eat her meals without throwing it at me first, may it be hot boiling soup or cold curd rice. Eventually i got smarter; i took small portions for her to fling out before trying to feed her the rest. (This was mainly cause the home doesn’t have so much of food to spare for food fights)
Gradually over the next few months we became close friends and she developed an interest in art. She did not only develop that but fits as well, in October we came to know that she had 2nd stage tongue cancer, that’s when life started taking a change all at once. I decided i wanted to adopt her, after much persuasion and disagreements and drama, all the family and friends finally said yes by this time it was already the end of the year.
Not only was the year ending but her hair was falling, (and she started hating Barbie) she was losing her plump self. There were no more chances for food fights as everything was given through drips. It was painful to watch and must have been even more painful for her to bear. Eventually the doctor decided to amputate her tongue. My heart sank and so did her life.
In preparation or the operation the home had to call her birth parents and the home was just a part time guardian. Shortly after the operation in January, they took her away and never even left an address, Maybe the Man up there couldn’t bear the injustice that he brought them back asking money for her Chemotherapy. After fighting with them and creating a Tamil serial of my own, they decided i could take her home, my home.
I started decorating the spare room to her liking of lime green and trying to make as comfortable as possible for her. I went to the parent’s house to pick her up and found her in a very un maintained condition. Deciding to check her into the hospital before i brought her home, is the decision i regret the most, watching her end her life there.
Irony of life, a stuffed lion she luved and i misplaced months ago got returned today instead of her, with the confusion of whether to laugh or cry at it, Cindie your much missed and will always be loved.
*it’s just a random scribble
Beautiful.
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